family conflicts essay

Greater Good Science Center • Magazine • In Action • In Education

Family Conflict Is Normal; It’s the Repair That Matters

Three months into the pandemic, I had the urge to see my 28-year-old daughter and her husband, 2,000 miles away. She had weathered an acute health crisis, followed by community protests that propelled them both onto the streets to serve food and clean up neighborhoods. They were coping, but the accumulation of challenges made the mom in me want to connect with and support them. So, together with my husband, my other daughter, and her husband, our family of six adults and two dogs formed a new pod inside my daughter’s home in the steamy heat of the Minneapolis summer.

As I packed, a wisp of doubt crept in. We six hadn’t lived together under the same roof, ever . Would I blow it? Would I “flap my lips,” as a friend calls it, and accidentally say something hurtful? Some time back, in a careless moment of exhaustion, I had insulted my brand-new son-in-law with a thoughtless remark. He was rightfully hurt, and it took a long letter and a phone call to get us back on track.

My own siblings and I were raised inside the intractable rupture that was my parents’ marriage. Their lifelong conflict sowed discord and division in everyone around them. I worked hard to create a different, positive family climate with my husband and our children. My old ghosts were haunting me, though, and I didn’t want to ruin a good thing. 

Yet research shows that it’s not realistic, or possible, or even healthy to expect that our relationships will be harmonious all the time. Everything we know from developmental science and research on families suggests that rifts will happen—and what matters more is how you respond to them. With many families spending more time together than ever now, there are ample opportunities for tension and hurt feelings. These moments also offer ample invitations to reconnect.

Disconnections are a fact of life

Researcher Ed Tronick, together with colleague Andrew Gianino, calculated how often infants and caregivers are attuned to each other. (Attunement is a back-and-forth rhythm of interaction where partners share positive emotions.) They found that it’s surprisingly little. Even in healthy, securely attached relationships, caregivers and babies are in sync only 30% of the time. The other 70%, they’re mismatched, out of synch, or making repairs and coming back together. Cheeringly, even babies work toward repairs with their gazes, smiles, gestures, protests, and calls.

These mismatches and repairs are critical, Tronick explains. They’re important for growing children’s self-regulation, coping, and resilience. It is through these mismatches—in small, manageable doses—that babies, and later children, learn that the world does not track them perfectly. These small exposures to the micro-stress of unpleasant feelings, followed by the pleasant feelings that accompany repair, or coming back together, are what give them manageable practice in keeping their boat afloat when the waters are choppy. Put another way, if a caregiver met all of their child’s needs perfectly, it would actually get in the way of the child’s development. 
 “Repairing ruptures is the most essential thing in parenting,” says UCLA neuropsychiatrist Dan Siegel , director of the Mindsight Institute and author of several books on interpersonal neurobiology.

Life is a series of mismatches, miscommunications, and misattunements that are quickly repaired, says Tronick , and then again become miscoordinated and stressful, and again are repaired. This occurs thousands of times in a day, and millions of times over a year.

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Other research shows that children have more conflicts and repairs with friends than non-friends. Sibling conflict is legendary; and adults’ conflicts escalate when they become parents. If interpersonal conflict is unavoidable—and even necessary—then the only way we can maintain important relationships is to get better at re-synchronizing them, and especially at tending to repairs when they rupture.

“Relationships shrink to the size of the field of repair,” says Rick Hanson , psychologist and author of several books on the neuroscience of well-being. “But a bid for a repair is one of the sweetest and most vulnerable and important kinds of communication that humans offer to each other,” he adds. “It says you value the relationship.”

Strengthening the family fabric

In a small Canadian study , researchers examined how parents of four- to seven-year-old children strengthened, harmed, or repaired their relationships with their children. Parents said their relationships with their children were strengthened by “horizontal” or egalitarian exchanges like playing together, negotiating, taking turns, compromising, having fun, or sharing psychological intimacy—in other words, respecting and enjoying one another. Their relationships were harmed by an over-reliance on power and authority, and especially by stonewalling tactics like the “silent treatment.” When missteps happened, parents repaired and restored intimacy by expressing warmth and affection, talking about what happened, and apologizing.

This model of strengthening, harming, and repairing can help you think about your own interactions. When a family relationship is already positive, there is a foundation of trust and a belief in the other’s good intentions, which helps everyone restore more easily from minor ruptures. For this reason, it helps to proactively tend the fabric of family relationships. 
 That can begin with simply building up an investment of positive interactions:

• Spend “special time” with each child individually to create more space to deepen your one-to-one relationship. Let them control the agenda and decide how long you spend together.
• Appreciate out loud, share gratitude reflections, and notice the good in your children intermittently throughout the day or week.

You also want to watch out for ways you might harm the relationship. If you’re ever unsure about a child’s motives, check their intentions behind their behaviors and don’t assume they were ill-intentioned. Language like, “I noticed that…” or “Tell me what happened…” or “And then what happened?” can help you begin to understand an experience from the child’s point of view.

A Loving Space for Kids’ Emotions

Show love to your children by helping them process emotions

When speaking to a child, consider how they might receive what you’re saying. Remember that words and silence have weight; children are “ emotional Geiger counters ” and read your feelings much more than they process your words. If you are working through feelings or traumas that have nothing to do with them, take care to be responsible for your own feelings and take a moment to calm yourself before speaking.

In this context of connection and understanding, you can then create a family culture where rifts are expected and repairs are welcomed:

• Watch for tiny bids for repairs . Sometimes we have so much on our minds that we miss the look, gesture, or expression in a child that shows that what they really want is to reconnect.
• Normalize requests like “I need a repair” or “Can we have a redo?” We need to be able to let others know when the relationship has been harmed.
• Likewise, if you think you might have stepped on someone’s toes, circle back to check. Catching a misstep early can help.

When you’re annoyed by a family member’s behavior, try to frame your request for change in positive language; that is, say what you want them to do rather than what you don’t. Language like, “I have a request…” or “Would you be willing to…?” keeps the exchange more neutral and helps the recipient stay engaged rather than getting defensive.

You can also model healthy repairs with people around you, so they are normalized and children see their usefulness in real time. Children benefit when they watch adults resolve conflict constructively.


Four steps to an authentic repair

There are infinite varieties of repairs, and they can vary in a number of ways, depending on your child’s age and temperament, and how serious the rift was.

Infants need physical contact and the restoration of love and security. Older children need affection and more words. Teenagers may need more complex conversations. Individual children vary in their styles—some need more words than others, and what is hurtful to one child may not faze another child. Also, your style might not match the child’s, requiring you to stretch further.

Some glitches are little and may just need a check-in, but deeper wounds need more attention. Keep the apology in proportion to the hurt. What’s important is not your judgment of how hurt someone should be, but the actual felt experience of the child’s hurt. A one-time apology may suffice, but some repairs need to be acknowledged frequently over time to really stitch that fabric back together. It’s often helpful to check in later to see if the amends are working.

While each repair is unique, authentic repairs typically involve the same steps.

1. Acknowledge the offense. First, try to understand the hurt you caused. It doesn’t matter if it was unintentional or what your reasons were. This is the time to turn off your own defense system and focus on understanding and naming the other person’s pain or anger.

Sometimes you need to check your understanding. Begin slowly: “Did I hurt you? Help me understand how.” This can be humbling and requires that we listen with an open heart as we take in the other person’s perspective.

Try not to undermine the apology by adding on any caveats, like blaming the child for being sensitive or ill-behaved or deserving of what happened. Any attempt to gloss over, minimize, or dilute the wound is not an authentic repair. Children have a keen sense for authenticity. Faking it or overwhelming them will not work.

A spiritual teacher reminded me of an old saying, “It is acknowledging the wound that gets the thorn out.” It’s what reconnects our humanity.

Making an Effective Apology

A good apology involves more than saying "sorry"

2. Express remorse. Here, a sincere “I’m sorry” is sufficient.

Don’t add anything to it. One of the mistakes adults often make, according to therapist and author Harriet Lerner , is to tack on a discipline component: “Don’t let it happen again,” or “Next time, you’re really going to get it.” This, says Lerner, is what prevents children from learning to use apologies themselves. 
 Apologizing can be tricky for adults. It might feel beneath us, or we may fear that we’re giving away our power. We shouldn’t have to apologize to a child, because as adults we are always right, right? Of course not. But it’s easy to get stuck in a vertical power relationship to our child that makes backtracking hard.

On the other hand, some adults—especially women, says Rick Hanson —can go overboard and be too effusive, too obsequious, or even too quick in their efforts to apologize. This can make the apology more about yourself than the person who was hurt. Or it could be a symptom of a need for one’s own boundary work.   

There is no perfect formula for an apology except that it be delivered in a way that acknowledges the wound and makes amends. And there can be different paths to that. Our family sometimes uses a jokey, “You were right, I was wrong, you were right, I was wrong, you were right, I was wrong,” to playfully acknowledge light transgressions. Some apologies are nonverbal: My father atoned for missing all of my childhood birthdays when he traveled 2,000 miles to surprise me at my doorstep for an adult birthday. Words are not his strong suit, but his planning, effort, and showing up was the repair. Apologies can take on all kinds of tones and qualities.

3. Consider offering a brief explanation. If you sense that the other person is open to listening, you can provide a brief explanation of your point of view, but use caution, as this can be a slippery slope. Feel into how much is enough. The focus of the apology is on the wounded person’s experience. If an explanation helps, fine, but it shouldn’t derail the intent. This is not the time to add in your own grievances—that’s a conversation for a different time.

4. Express your sincere intention to fix the situation and to prevent it from happening again. With a child, especially, try to be concrete and actionable about how the same mistake can be prevented in the future. “I’m going to try really hard to…” and “Let’s check back in to see how it’s feeling…” can be a start.

Remember to forgive yourself, too. This is a tender process, we are all works in progress, and adults are still developing. I know I am.

Prior to our visit, my daughter and I had a phone conversation. We shared our excitement about the rare chance to spend so much time together. Then we gingerly expressed our concerns.

 “I’m afraid we’ll get on each other’s nerves,” I said.

“I’m afraid I’ll be cooking and cleaning the whole time,” she replied.

So we strategized about preventing these foibles. She made a spreadsheet of chores where everyone signed up for a turn cooking and cleaning, and we discussed the space needs that people would have for working and making phone calls.

Then I drew a breath and took a page from the science. “I think we have to expect that conflicts are going to happen,” I said. “It’s how we work through them that will matter. The love is in the repair.”

This article is excerpted from a longer article on Diana Divecha’s blog, developmentalscience.com.

About the Author

Diana Divecha

Diana Divecha, Ph.D. , is a developmental psychologist, an assistant clinical professor at the Yale Child Study Center and Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, and on the advisory board of the Greater Good Science Center. Her blog is developmentalscience.com .

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Family Conflict (Essay Sample)

Family conflict.

It is normal to disagree with one another from time to time. Intermittent conflict is part of family life . Family members can disagree when they have different beliefs or views that clash with the interests of others. However, family conflict can be stressful and damage the relationships among family members especially when the members are prone to misunderstanding one another and jumping to wrongly skewed conclusions. The result may be unresolved conflicts that manifest in continuous arguments and end in resentment. Intense family conflict can lead to break-ups and dissolution of marriages or separation of siblings and everlasting disunity even in important matters that affect the family members.

Family conflicts arise for various reasons. Finance and jobs are the main causes of family conflicts. Failure to secure a good job that earns the breadwinner significant income to pay for bills, service mortgages or pay rent, buy food, and fund recreation activities for the family members is the main cause of conflict between the spouses and by extension the siblings. Most often, one of the spouses will tend to believe that the other spouse is spending the money  elsewhere and is not caring for them and begin to quarrel. Also, where one of the spouses is engaged with a job that keeps him or her away from the other spouse and the children will feel neglected and incite conflict. Similarly, if the breadwinner loses the job, the family members are likely to be stressed and quarrel as their future financial situation becomes uncertain.

Apart from finances and jobs, family conflicts could arise from sibling rivalry. Siblings will naturally compete with one another for parental approval or attention. Such competition may involve causing harm to others, teasing one another, or tattling. Either of such practices will eventually result in conflict among the siblings, especially where the parent does not intervene and uphold equality among the siblings through showing equal love and acceptance for all.

In addition to finance, jobs, and sibling rivalry, lack of patience and understanding among the family members is another cause of conflict. The sustainability of families requires patience from both members since there are events that occur along the way which could be unfavorable. For instance, at some point, a breadwinner may lose his or her job. Family members ought to be patient and understand the situation as they await a resolution to the situation. Most often, the other spouse would be impatient and rush to conclude that the family has lost direction leading to quarrels and conflict in the family.

Since family conflicts are inevitable, there should be ways of resolving or avoiding the conflicts to avoid the adverse effects of these conflicts. One of the ways to resolve family conflicts is to be patient and slow to quarrel. Holding the tongue for a few seconds can be a great step towards resolving a conflict. Spouses can calm down and think of better ways to respond to a situation or a developing conflict. With patience, a better thought solution can be offered to resolve a conflict than quickly rushing to fight with one another. Also, family members can avoid conflicts by getting hard on their problems and not just blaming one another. Avoiding the blame games opens room for concessions and allows the family members to work together in finding solutions to their problems.

Overall, family conflicts can easily be predicted as they develop from obvious issues such as finance, jobs or sibling rivalry. As a family head, one ought to keep track of these issues and be in the leading line to offer solutions to such problems before the conflict arises. Patience and understanding are crucial for all family members if conflicts are to be avoided.

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Being part of a family can be pretty beneficial as it brings you love, security, and support. Family members who understand and appreciate you can help you overcome many challenges that life throws at you. But sometimes, there can also be conflict.

It’s common for family members to have disagreements. While conflicts are rather natural, healthy, and unavoidable, when they remain unresolved or escalate, they can become a significant cause of stress and problems in relationships.

Family conflicts can be particularly distressing because they are so deeply personal. You may feel tied to your family and unable to distance yourself or let go. Besides, when certain problems arise over and over again for many years, it can be easy to get stuck in familiar patterns of interaction.

If conflicts have become a problem in your family and you’re struggling to find ways to resolve them, this article will give you some tips that might help.

We also asked Tiffany Lovins , a Licensed Mental Health Counselor at Calmerry , to share some insights into this subject. But before we tell you how to deal with family conflicts, let’s first take a quick look at some of the most common causes.

Causes of family conflict

“ Belonging to any part of a group or system naturally creates an environment that is rich with individual differences in wants, needs, beliefs, and values, ” explains Tiffany and goes on, “ Our own family system is no different in this regard and is often even more complicated due to the closeness of these relationships and the interdependence that exists in a family unit. ”

Tiffany also notes that the underlying causes of conflict may not be obvious: “ There are several primary causes of family conflict that are most often experienced, though they all hold an underlying theme regardless of the topic at hand. The top causes for conflict are often finances, child-rearing, and discipline, involvement of in-laws, sibling rivalry, or push for autonomy within the family unit.”

“Regardless of the cause, all contain an underlying theme of incongruency in expectations and communication that ultimately lead to conflict in these areas. ”

Lack of communication

One of the most common factors that trigger conflict in a family is a lack of open communication . Without effective communication, it becomes difficult for family members to make sure that their needs are met, and their boundaries are respected.

The lack of communication may also make a person feel like their needs and desires are not worth sharing. As a result, family members may get stuck in a vicious circle where previous communication problems create new ones .

Family duties

Family conflicts also often stem from responsibilities. Misunderstandings may arise from the way family members divide household chores and other responsibilities.

For instance, there might be arguments regarding who is supposed to take care of children or elderly family members . Although these are often small conflicts, they may last for a long time if left unresolved.

Disagreements related to financial issues can have a severely destructive impact on all kinds of relationships, including those between romantic partners and family members. Spouses and siblings often argue over money management. And the situation may get even more difficult if there are any inheritance issues in the family.

Differences in values

This is a very common cause of conflict between romantic partners and between parents and their children. People may hold different opinions regarding politics, morals, culture, etc. There is often a greater risk of this as children shift into developmental stages, where strengthening their independence and identity take center stage.

As a result, partners or family members may lose the sense of unity, and the whole family dynamics may shift in a negative direction.

Blended families

When two families start to live together, they enter a risky area because the more people are involved, the more likely things may go wrong.

Given that even people who’ve shared the same roof for years may have serious conflicts, it’s no surprise that the situation might get more complicated when introducing new people – each with their unique needs, views, and habits.

This can be further complicated if the children have multiple households where different expectations and rules are held.

Goals and expectations are out of sync

“ There are often unspoken rules, norms, and beliefs about everyone’s role in the family and resulting expectations attached to each role ,” explains Tiffany Lovins , “ When these expectations and needs of the individual are not openly communicated and aligned, it can result in each member reacting on assumptions and emotions, thus creating a breeding ground for conflict. ”

The counselor adds, “ Once this is put into motion, each individual tends to resort to their default communication style, which further alienates each person from the other. Some may become passive and shut down. Others may attack or respond aggressively. ”

Tiffany notes that this way, the mutual goals of the family can be lost in the process. And this increases the vulnerability of each to blame and attack rather than partnering together to address concerns.

“ Identifying and stating openly that the mutual goal is always to create a space of health and happiness for each individual and the family can be a great starting point for difficult conversations, ” comments Tiffany.

How to resolve family conflicts

No matter what caused a particular argument, it’s important to know how to prevent further escalation and minimize the probability of such conflicts happening in the future.

Here are the 10 tips for navigating family conflicts and improving your communication skills.

1. Accept what you can and cannot control

No matter how much you may want to, you cannot control the behavior of others. But you can control how you respond . Think of the conflicts you’ve had in the past, how you reacted, and what the outcomes were.

If the results don’t match your expectations, reflect on your approach and determine if it accurately reflects your intended need or request in a way that maintains your self-respect and the respect of the relationship. If not, try responding differently next time; hopefully, it will have a more positive effect.

Changing the way you respond makes you less predictable, making it harder for others to trigger or manipulate you into conflict. Suppose you have communicated as effectively as possible, and it is still not well received. In that case,  this may indicate a need to redefine the boundaries and expectations in this relationship.

2. Let any anger subside

It’s better to let things calm down before trying to resolve a conflict so that you can have a rational and constructive conversation. When emotions are high, the functional part of our brains goes offline, and it truly makes it hard to have a reasonable discussion with effective solutions. Try talking in a calm tone and put any emotions aside.

If you try to resolve a conflict while people are angry and lashing out, such attempts may fail or even worsen the situation further. Remember, the goal here is not to win an argument but to find a healthy and mutually beneficial resolution.

3. Try to understand other family members’ perspectives

It’s important to give other family members a chance to express their views without being interrupted. And you should also request an opportunity to do the same

Listen actively: try to understand things from other peoples’ perspectives and then identify what you could do differently to help resolve the conflict. Listening to others and having empathy is a way to be fair and gain valuable insights. It’s not about submitting or caving to the demands of others.

4. Understand how it affects the whole family

It’s easy to get caught up in a conflict without realizing how much it’s affecting those around you. For example, when parents argue, children can often pick up on their stress and mood changes, even if they try to hide them.

However, when the family members involved in a conflict understand how it’s hurting the rest of the family, they’re more likely to be open to finding a resolution.

5. Use “I” instead of “you”

When you’re attempting to resolve a conflict, “you”-statements may sound like accusations, triggering a defensive response and making it harder to connect.

Use “I”-statements and talk about how you feel instead. You’ll be less likely to trigger other people’s defenses while highlighting your personal perspective, your emotions, and the critical issues you need to work through.

6. Recognize that some issues aren’t worth fighting over

Not every issue is worth fighting over. For example, if your partner or kids did something trivial that bothered you, such as not putting the bins out, consider whether such an issue would be worth getting into an argument about.

Remember, accidents can happen, people can forget, everyone makes mistakes, and not everything is done to hurt you intentionally.

However, this doesn’t mean you should tolerate toxic or abusive behavior . And you have the right to be concerned and speak up if you often moderate yourself because of the fear of other family members.

7. Try reaching out rather than withdrawing

If you see other family members as a threat, you may withdraw as a way to protect yourself. However, isolating yourself can prolong the issues between you and make it harder to resolve the conflict.

So, when you feel like withdrawing, try being the bigger person and reaching out instead. Taking a risk and making the first move often pays off, giving you and other family members a chance to resolve things and reconnect.

8. Work as a team

A healthy family is a solid unit, but families consist of multiple people . Even couples without children may run into conflicts of interest. And the situation may not get any easier if people have children or live with other relatives.

To ensure mutual understanding and support, it’s important to agree on common goals and everyone’s individual contribution.

“ Making an effort to have intentional conversations about expectations of each other and each person’s role in meeting these goals is critical, especially as each individual evolves (and so do their needs and capabilities), ” explains Tiffany Lovins.

9. Seek professional help and support if needed

For many people, family is a major part of their lives, and they consider it worth investing in to get it right. Seeking impartial guidance and the help of an expert can help you and your family work through any challenges effectively.

Whether it’s relationship therapy to help build a healthy romantic relationship or online counseling to improve your anger management skills, there’s professional support available for all types of issues.

Those stuck in toxic relationships can also benefit from emotional abuse help.

10. Minimize or end contact completely if nothing helps

While it often pays off to reach out rather than withdraw, some conflicts are simply unresolvable, and you’re better off minimizing or ending contact entirely.

This applies particularly to situations where abuse has occurred, and you expect it could continue in the future. Ending contact is usually the last option, but it’s worth considering if your or your loved one’s health and well-being are at risk.

If you’re a victim of abuse, please contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline . If you’re in immediate danger, please call 911.

While family conflicts can cause considerable distress and anxiety , finding a healthy resolution is often possible. Remember to let things cool off first and try to consider other family members’ perspectives. Improving your conflict resolution skills is a worthwhile endeavor that could help you in many areas of your life.

If you need additional support, seeking the help of a professional is always a wise choice. Here at Calmerry , our online therapists are ready to work with you individually to resolve any emotional problems you have and improve your mental well-being.

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Family Conflict Essays

Film: brothers & sisters – patriarchy, work/family conflicts during the covid-19 pandemic, connecting issues to cultural identities with empathy: family conflict, popular essay topics.

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Home Essay Samples Life Divorce

Cause and Effect of Broken Family: Exploring the Impact on Individuals and Society

Table of contents, causes of broken families, effects on individuals, consequences for society, addressing the impact, conclusion: fostering resilience and support.

• Amato, P. R. (2000). The consequences of divorce for adults and children. Journal of Marriage and Family, 62(4), 1269-1287.
• McLanahan, S., & Sandefur, G. (1994). Growing up with a single parent: What hurts, what helps. Harvard University Press.
• Heath, A. F., & Killewald, A. (2013). The importance of nonresident fathers for children's well-being. Annual Review of Sociology, 39, 149-170.
• Braver, S. L., Wolchik, S. A., Sandler, I. N., Sheets, V., Fogas, B., & Bay, R. C. (1993). A longitudinal study of noncustodial parents: Parents without children. Journal of Family Psychology, 7(1), 9-23.
• Wallerstein, J. S., & Kelly, J. B. (1980). Surviving the breakup: How children and parents cope with divorce. Basic Books.

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Family Conflict Resolution: 6 Worksheets & Scenarios (+ PDF)

It is perhaps unrealistic to expect that relationships remain harmonious all the time; occasional disconnections and disagreements are a fact of life that can help a family grow and move forward, accommodating change (Divecha, 2020).

Repeating patterns of conflict, however, can be damaging for family members, especially children, negatively affecting mental and physical wellbeing (Sori, Hecker, & Bachenberg, 2016).

This article explores how to resolve conflict in family relationships and introduces strategies and activities that can help.

Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our three Positive Communication Exercises (PDF) for free . These science-based tools will help you and those you work with build better social skills and better connect with others.

This Article Contains:

How to resolve conflict in family relationships, 2 examples of conflict scenarios, 3 strategies for family counseling sessions, 6 activities and worksheets to try, a note on conflict resolution for kids, 3 best games and activities for kids, resources from positivepsychology.com, a take-home message.

“Families typically develop certain basic structural characteristics and interactive patterns that they utilize to respond to internal and external stressors.”

Goldenberg, 2017, p. 4

Built on shared assumptions and narratives that exist within the family structure, family members support the group as it adapts and copes with shifting environments and life events.

Such structures, at times, may support and even promote conflict that occurs within families. Indeed, rifts, clashes, and disagreements within the family can take many forms, including physical, verbal, financial, psychological, and sexual (Marta & Alfieri, 2014).

Therapy has the potential to help a family understand how it organizes itself and maintains cohesion, while improving how it communicates and overcomes problems that lead to conflict (Goldenberg, 2017).

As psychologist Rick Hanson writes, “a bid for repair is one of the sweetest and most vulnerable and important kinds of communication that humans offer to each other” (cited in Divecha, 2020).

Crucially, families can learn to navigate the inevitable tension and disconnection that arise from falling out of sync with one another (Divecha, 2020).

Repairing ruptures resulting from miscommunication, mismatches, and failing to attune to one another is vital for parenting and maintaining family union. But how?

While there are many ways to recover from and resolve conflict, the following four steps are invaluable for authentic repair (modified from Divecha, 2020):

• Acknowledge the offense Try to identify and understand the hurt you’ve caused. Whether intended and with apparent good reason or not, this is a valuable opportunity to dial down your defenses and focus on how the other person is feeling.

Acknowledging the hurt without adding caveats is a powerful way to show humanity.

It can help to check your understanding, “Did I upset you? Help me understand how.” Your approach must be open and authentic; unless heartfelt, it risks escalating emotions.

• Express remorse Sometimes, simply saying, “I’m sorry,” is enough, or at least an excellent place to start.

Take care though. Adding a comment, such as, “Well, you shouldn’t have done X,” weakens your expression of remorse, especially when dealing with children. They are learning from what you do – right and wrong.

Also, don’t go overboard. Being too quick to say sorry or going over the top with an apology can make it more about yourself than the person hurt.

• Offer a simple explanation If the other person is ready to listen (neither too upset nor too angry), a brief explanation can clarify the thinking behind your actions.

Remember to focus on the other person’s experience rather than a litany of excuses for poor behavior. And avoid using this as an opportunity to add grievances or assign blame for issues that have arisen recently.

• Learn and practice expressing your intentions to fix the situation and stop it from happening again. Be sincere. Say that you are sorry and mean it.

There is little point in apologizing and recovering from conflict if you intend to repeat the behavior.

Conflict is often avoidable. But if it isn’t, then it is possible to recover and maintain family relationships through authentic activities that repair damage (Divecha, 2020).

Family therapy can help resolve conflicts within the family unit through multiple routes, including:

• Exploring various relationships that make up the family.
• Bringing couples and families together to resolve interpersonal conflicts rather than treating them separately.
• Focusing on interventions with entire families rather than individuals.
• Establishing the role of dysfunctional families in individual mental health problems.

Family conflict can appear in all shapes and sizes. While minor disagreements between siblings may be resolved quickly, major rifts can form between child and parent, damaging previously strong bonds.

All relationships within a family can at one time or another descend into conflict. Two such examples include (modified from Goldenberg, 2017):

• Conflict over money Bob and Tess are married with two children. In therapy, Tess claims that Bob is mean with his money: checking grocery bills and yelling at the cost of their children’s birthday presents. Along with other relationship issues, conflict had led them to sleep in separate rooms.

Bob argues he works hard for his money and gives her a generous amount each month, but Tess spends beyond their means.

During therapy, it became clear that Bob comes from a working-class family and was taught from an early age to live frugally. His long-standing beliefs underpin (but do not excuse) his outbursts.

In time, therapy helps them become more supportive of one another, giving up their underlying power struggles and successfully moving away from stereotypical gender roles.

• Cultural and intergenerational conflict Despite Indira and Sanjay Singh moving to the United States while they were still at preschool age, they have retained the cultural and moral values of their place of birth: India. When their two children were born, they were also taught to be compliant and respect their parents, while friends from school were discouraged.

As the children grew older, it became clear that the conflict between the old and new culture was causing a rift, dividing children and parents. Despite reluctance from the parents, in time, all four attended family therapy and began to deal with cultural differences and expectations arising from multiculturalism.

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Conflict in family situations can be “chronic and unresolved,” cycling through “periods of emotional distance and closeness with intense negative feelings” (Metcalf, 2011, p. 45).

In family therapy, the many theories offer different lenses through which to view the world and, most importantly, help families manage and resolve conflict (Metcalf, 2011).

The following strategies can help protect the family from or cope with conflict in its many forms.

Build an environment of connection and understanding

Divecha (2020) suggests that by building an environment of connection and understanding, you can “create a family culture where rifts are expected and repairs are welcomed.”

Encourage clients to make small but vital changes to the family setting (modified from Divecha, 2020):

• Watch out for the easily missed signs that indicate a child, young adult, or partner wishes to find a way to reconnect and recover from conflict.
• Normalize requests, such as, “I need a repair” and “Can we have a redo?” that tell us a family member is ready to fix a damaged relationship.
• Maintain awareness. If we think we may have caused upset or harm, circle back and check in with the other person.

Building a better environment through frequent repairs can catch problems early and reduce the likelihood of escalation.

Use “I” statements

How we say something can have a significant impact on what others hear. Encourage family members to express how they feel without blaming others, such as (modified from Goldenberg, 2017):

“I am hurt by what you said last night” rather than accusations, such as, “You were out of order last night.”

Speak directly to the therapist

There may be times during a therapy session when tension between family members heightens and the emotional intensity needs to be de-escalated (Goldenberg, 2017).

A helpful communication technique is to ask the family member talking to address the therapist directly. This refocus encourages the speaker to express themselves more calmly and allows the other person time and space to listen and respond under less pressure.

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Interventions in family therapy exist to help the individual by improving family engagement and effectiveness and reduce the adverse outcomes of caregiving (American Psychological Association, 2011).

The following activities focus on exploring family structures, beliefs, and problem-solving behavior to avoid or resolve conflict within the group.

Recognizing Family Narratives

Use the Recognizing Family Narratives worksheet to identify narratives that explain and justify the structure and interactive patterns that exist within the family.

The constructs we form can enable or inhibit how we cope with conflict and other life events within the family (Goldenberg, 2017).

Parenting With Purpose

Parenting can be difficult; it is easy to lose sight of what is important. Defining meaning and purpose for ourselves as parents and our children can offer a valuable compass for day-to-day decision-making (Hart, 2006).

The Parenting With Purpose worksheet is a helpful reminder of your values and purpose as a parent.

The answers to the questions can help you understand what kind of relationship you would like with your children and why.

What Is Working Within the Family?

While it is essential to identify and fix what is causing conflict within a family, it is equally valuable to recognize what is working.

Once we recognize where we are successful in a relationship, it can remind us that not everything is terrible. We are doing some things right, and we have something upon which we can build.

The What Is Working worksheet helps identify and share the positives in the relationships within the family.

Recognize that conflict doesn’t occur in the family all the time and encourage the activities that unite you as a group.

Meeting Our Family’s Needs

Sura Hart (2006, p. 175), former teacher and education project director for the Center for Nonviolent Communication, says that “you can find conflict in every human story, and in the conflict situation you can find the needs people are wanting to meet.”

Use the Meeting Our Family’s Needs worksheet to help each family member have their needs heard, understood, and, ultimately, accepted.

Consider Your Intentions

Words have the power to share love and anger. Without clear and conscious intention, it is possible to communicate unhelpful and even harmful messages (Hart, 2006).

Use the Consider Your Intentions worksheet to identify and understand your intentions and help you respect and care for other family members’ needs.

Perform an early check on your intentions before you engage with the other family member, especially if it has the potential to turn into conflict.

Using the answers, consider how you can show positive intentions and steer clear of harmful intentions, such as proving yourself right.

Seeing Family Conflict as a Problem to Solve

Conflict isn’t always to be avoided; clashes can be productive, stimulating learning, fostering understanding, and moving a relationship forward (Hart, 2006).

However, some conflict is unnecessary and avoidable, especially regarding daily tasks, such as tidying the house, going to bed, and completing chores.

Use the Seeing Family Conflict as a Problem to Solve worksheet to help recognize everyday actions as problems to overcome rather than points of contention.

14 Effective conflict resolution techniques – BRAINY DOSE

“Life is a series of mismatches, miscommunications, and misattunements that are quickly repaired” says family researcher Ed Tronick (cited in Divecha, 2020).

Children can learn from the family environment that conflict need not be out of proportion to the situation and may, ultimately, lead to positive change.

It helps when family relationships are overwhelmingly positive. Make sure to make “special time” available for each child, where they have control over what you do and for how long, writes Divecha (2020). Learn to show gratitude and appreciation for what the child does more readily without it becoming predictable and unthinking.

Board games such as Monopoly, Checkers, and Life can be played as a pair or a family. The children see that it’s okay to make mistakes and learn from their parents’ reaction to losing.

More physical, active games such as Tag or Hide and Seek allow the whole family to have fun, while, importantly, seeing each other having fun. Children need to experience their parents as humans with a wish to enjoy themselves. Parents benefit from experiencing their family laughing – a reminder that life is not all about duty and rules.

Quieter pastimes, including art and craft, can be a time to build and use mindfulness practices, considering colors, textures, and smells. Interactive activities such as making funny characters out of play dough or houses out of Lego is fun and beyond rules or feelings of failure.

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Family conflict can often be avoided. The following resources help individuals gain a greater understanding of other family members’ needs and feelings.

• Mind the Gap Identify and share the values you would like to exist within your family, such as love, trust, compassion, and teamwork.
• Conflict at School Conflict outside the home can have an impact inside. Help your children to reflect on the relationships they have at school.

Additional reading and resources include:

• Conflict Resolution in Relationships and Couples: 5 Strategies For more ideas on how to resolve conflict in other types of relationships, read our conflict resolution in relationships article.
• 14 Conflict Resolution Strategies & Techniques for the Workplace This article about conflict resolution in the workplace is a helpful additional read, especially where the lines between family and work is blurred – working in the family business, working from home – these all can cause conflict so be sure to have a look at this article too.

If you’re looking for more science-based ways to help others communicate better, check out this collection of 17 validated positive communication tools for practitioners. Use them to help others improve their communication skills and form deeper and more positive relationships.

It is vital that families learn to survive – and even grow – under adverse conditions. The family unit faces daily challenges from outside and conflict from within that can upset the internal stability that rests upon existing narratives, shared beliefs, and sometimes mistaken assumptions (Goldenberg, 2017).

It can become less about preventing all conflict, which is impossible, and more about creating a family environment that reduces unnecessary friction, repairs rifts and misunderstandings, grows, and moves forward.

Our communication – what we say and how we say it – remains crucial and can improve over time with practice and an improved awareness of one another’s needs. Family members can also learn skills and techniques to improve self-regulation, resilience, and coping that strengthen internal structures.

This article introduces tools and worksheets that help remove avoidable conflict and manage and resolve it within the family unit, where disagreement is inevitable. Try them out with your clients or within your own family to improve engagement, strengthen relationships, and build a more supportive and resilient family structure.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Positive Communication Exercises (PDF) for free .

• American Psychological Association. (2011). Family interventions. Retrieved October 6, 2021, from https://www.apa.org/pi/about/publications/caregivers/practice-settings/intervention/family
• Divecha, D. (2020, October 27). Family conflict is normal; it’s the repair that matter s. Greater Good. Retrieved October 4, 2021, from https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/family_conflict_is_normal_its_the_repair_that_matters
• Goldenberg, I. (2017). Family therapy: An overview . Cengage Learning.
• Hart, S. (2006). Respectful parents, respectful kids: 7 Keys to turn family conflict into co-operation . PuddleDancer Press.
• Marta, E., & Alfieri, S. (2014). Family conflicts. In A. C. Michalos (Ed.), Encyclopedia of quality of life and well-being research . Springer.
• Metcalf, L. (2011). Marriage and family therapy: A practice-oriented approach . Springer.
• Sori, C. F., Hecker, L., & Bachenberg, M. E. (2016). The therapist’s notebook for children and adolescents: Homework, handouts, and activities for use in psychotherapy . Routledge/Taylor & Francis.

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7 Types of Family Conflict: Why Do Families Fight? (+ Examples)

The varieties and types of family conflict span a wide range of potential disputes we see in various settings of modern life. Of course, there are numerous reasons a married couple may regularly argue, but the reasons couples fight must be an entirely different (and lengthy) article.

Hence, this article focuses on the most common types of family conflict between family members who are not married. That means adult siblings, parents, and children and extended family conflict.

Why Do Families Fight More Than Friends?

Families often experience more conflict than friendships due to the inherent closeness and intensity of familial relationships. Unlike friends, families are connected through deep-seated bonds that encompass a mix of emotions, histories, and expectations. This can lead to higher stakes in interactions and less flexibility in relationships.

Additionally, the permanence of family-unlike friends who can be distanced if discord arises-means that family members are more frequently forced to confront and negotiate their differences, no matter how challenging. This proximity and the inability to easily sever ties contribute to the increased frequency of conflicts within families as opposed to those among friends.

What Causes Families to Fight? Causes & Examples

So why do families fight? Here are 7 of the most common areas of conflict that we have seen family members argue over.

Money is a big one, of course. From fighting over inheritance to disagreeing about who will pay for aging parents or family events, family financial conflict is top of the list when it comes to types of family conflict.

If a family member feels they have been treated unfairly or not given their fair share, they can harbor resentment for years or maybe even a lifetime. That’s because money is often associated with meanings and emotions that run deeply for individuals.

They may feel they were cheated or disrespected or that their entire lifestyle was significantly impacted due to these financial conflicts. Such associations and the resulting painful emotions aren’t easily forgotten. That’s why a family fighting over money can be so devastating and why this type of matter must be dealt with and resolved as quickly as possible.

Examples of Family Conflict over Money

After the death of a family patriarch, two brothers found themselves at odds over the distribution of estate assets. Despite the existence of a will, disagreements over the valuation of property and accusations of undue influence led to a prolonged legal battle, straining family relationships and leading to a permanent rift between the siblings.

2. Family Business

Several families are engaged in a family-run business, often started by a single family couple and then passed down to the couple’s children, who must find ways to work together. Also, siblings tend to go into business together. And why not? It’s difficult to trust people these days, and we should be able to trust our siblings, right?

Unfortunately, there are all types of family conflict in family business . Partnerships are hard, regardless of whether the partners are related or not. But when partners are family members, business conflicts often spill over into extended family conflict. Non-invested siblings can get pulled into the ordeal, cousins can build animosity toward each other, and even elderly parents may be brought in to take sides with brother-business partners.

Examples of Family Conflict Over Businesses

In a family-owned bakery, the founder’s retirement brought to light deep-seated disagreements about succession. The youngest daughter, who had been managing the bakery for years, expected to take over. However, her older brother, who had invested financially but not operationally, contested her leadership, leading to legal disputes and strained family gatherings.

3. In-Law-Related Conflict

You know the scenario, and it’s a cliche at this point. Unfortunately for those experiencing in-law-related conflict, the stress is all too real and relentless. From mother-in-law conflicts with daughters-in-law to mother-in-law son-in-law conflict, personality clashes in families are rampant when taking on a new set of parents or a new adult as part of the family.

Sure, the couple is in love, but couples must remember they are not only marrying their spouse. They are marrying his or her family as well. So each partner had better be sure they know what they are marrying into because people don’t change very easily. That means the mothers-, fathers-, sons-, and daughters-in-law you know on the day of the marriage will likely be the ones that stick around for good.

If you’re hoping they will change, you’re probably in for a rude awakening. Typical arguments in a wife and mother-in-law conflict, for instance, might revolve around how to treat her husband, how to raise the children, how to spend money more responsibly, and so on. This is one of the many types of family conflict that can arise in extended family dynamics.

Examples of Family Conflict With In-Laws

A classic example occurred when Sarah and her mother-in-law disagreed over where to spend Christmas. The mother-in-law insisted that the holiday should always be spent at her house, following her family traditions. This led to significant tension, as Sarah wanted to start new traditions with her husband and their children, leading to annual disputes that dampened the holiday spirit.

4. Conflict Over Family Events

Events are stressful without any interpersonal problems thrown into the mix. Planning takes work, money, and time, and when trivial things don’t go as planned, it can cause a lot of anxiety. Perhaps the stress related to an event is one reason interpersonal issues often emerge, and certainly, interpersonal problems add to the stress.

Families often argue about topics related to major and even minor events on issues such as who is on (and who is left out of) the invite list, who is paying for what, which dates work for everyone, the location of the event, and who to use as vendors. Everyone involved construes their own needs as a top priority, which makes resolving family arguments about events pretty difficult. This is a common example of types of family conflict that can occur around family gatherings and celebrations.

Examples of Family Conflict Over Events

For their parents’ 50th wedding anniversary, siblings Tom and Linda clashed over the event’s budget and venue. Tom wanted a lavish celebration to honor the milestone, willing to invest a significant amount of money, while Linda advocated for a more modest gathering at a local community center to save costs. Their inability to agree on the scale and location of the event led to ongoing tension and resentment, complicating the planning process and dampening the overall spirit of the celebration.

5. Sibling Conflict over Care of Elderly Parent

As parents age, siblings are typically responsible for how to care for their elderly parents. Some people feel the best place for their parents will be in one of the children’s homes or in an assisted living facility, while others feel they should remain in the family house or in a retirement community.

There are no easy answers as to what should be done about caring for elderly parents, and so sibling conflict over the care of an elderly parent can foster stubbornness and deeply felt anger between siblings or any other parties responsible for an aging loved one. This scenario is one of the types of family conflict that can be particularly challenging due to the emotional and logistical complexities involved.

Examples of Family Conflict Over Elderly Parents

In the case of the Johnson siblings, conflict arose when it was time to decide whether their widowed mother should stay in her home or move into an assisted living facility. The eldest sibling felt it was safer for their mother to be in a facility where she could receive professional care, while the younger sibling believed it was best for her to stay in her familiar environment with family nearby.

6. Stepparent-Stepchild Conflict

Adopting a stepchild is a serious and emotional endeavor, but accepting a stepparent is probably even more serious and more difficult. Certainly, when minor children live in a household with a stepparent they do not like and/or who doesn’t much like them, the family unit is set up for strife and resentment.

Even grown children of a parent who remarries can find themselves at odds over their parent’s choice of a new partner. And when children are affected, especially small children, other members of the family may be drawn into the stepparent-stepchild conflict.

If the problems are obvious and worsening, grandparents, uncles, and aunts may throw in their two cents, which can create further conflict between them and the new step-parent or even the biological parent. Of all types of family conflicts, stepparent-stepchild conflict may be the most difficult to witness since it can directly involve young children.

Examples of Family Conflict Regarding Stepparents

A notable example involved a blended family where the stepmother wanted to establish new holiday traditions that did not include the children’s extended biological family. This decision led to tension and feelings of exclusion among the stepchildren, who cherished the long-standing family gatherings with their biological relatives. The conflict escalated to the point where it required family therapy to address the children’s feelings of alienation and to find a compromise that honored both new and old traditions.

7. Divorced Parents Conflict Over Care & Discipline of Children

Of course, there could be (and are) entirely separate articles on the topic of divorcee arguments. Putting aside financial matters for a moment, the proper care and discipline of shared children is a central point of contention for many divorcees.

One parent may have a more rigid style, for example, while the other parent is more lenient. Each parent then feels much of their effort is being dissolved as soon as the child leaves to go to the other parent’s home. This can be frustrating and sometimes enraging.

Co-parents that work together amicably are a blessing to see. Co-parents who are regularly arguing are often extremely stressed by the conflict with their former spouse. Sometimes it is better for the ex-partners simply not to communicate, or at least to communicate as little as possible and only then about very logistical matters related to the child (e.g., the schedule or a field trip). It’s also crucial for the child to have their own space at each parent’s home to feel secure and maintain a sense of stability, which can help mitigate some of the stress associated with moving between homes.

Examples of Family Conflict With Divorced Parents

In the case of the Smith family, issues emerged following the divorce of Mr. and Mrs. Smith, particularly regarding parenting styles. Mr. Smith held a strict approach, believing in structured schedules and firm rules for their two children. Conversely, Mrs. Smith embraced a more relaxed style, focusing on flexibility and open communication. This disparity led to friction as each parent felt that their efforts were undermined by the other’s contrasting approach.

How to Stop Families From Fighting

Resolving family conflicts effectively requires a combination of good communication, empathy, and sometimes professional intervention. The first step in preventing disputes is to establish clear and open communication where the family feels heard and valued. This involves active listening, where each person is allowed to express their feelings without interruption or judgment. It’s important for family members to also express appreciation for each other’s perspectives and find common ground where possible.

When conflicts escalate beyond simple resolutions or involve deep-seated issues, it might be beneficial to engage a professional mediator. Pollack Peacebuilding Systems (PPS) specializes in conflict resolution and can help families navigate the complexities of their disagreements. Our mediators are trained to be impartial and facilitate discussions that aim to achieve mutually acceptable resolutions. They can help families develop strategies to manage conflicts, improve relationship dynamics, and foster a more peaceful home environment.

Getting Help With All Types of Family Conflicts

There is no easy fix for dealing with any type of family conflict. Some of the time, one motivated family member can lead the charge in handling family conflict in order to resolve family arguments and help all parties move past the issues. Often, however, families cannot seem to resolve the conflict on their own.To effectively manage all types of family conflicts without resorting to physical abuse, it would be prudent to hire an expert in family conflict resolution strategies . For immediate help with a family dispute, contact Pollack Peacebuilding . We’re passionate about helping families find and maintain peace.

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Jeremy Pollack

Dr. Jeremy Pollack is a social psychologist and conflict resolution consultant focusing on the psychology, social dynamics, and peacebuilding methodologies of interpersonal and intergroup conflicts. He is the founder of Pollack Peacebuilding Systems, an internationally renowned workplace conflict resolution consulting firm.  Learn more about Dr. Pollack here!

Mediation of Family Conflicts Analytical Essay

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Arguments, disputes, and conflicts can be characteristic for any family in spite of the number of members and character of their relations. Family-related conflicts are often based on the problems in communication and inability to solve the issue in a way which is appropriate for both parties.

Thus, family-related conflicts are disagreements in interests, values, and opinions, and they can be caused by misperceptions, misunderstandings, different visions of the same problem, and poor communication. There are many cases when people are unable to solve the conflict without references to independent mediators or legal services. The situation can be discussed as complicated when children are also involved in a family conflict.

That is why, families often need the qualified help provided by mediators in order to solve the conflict, meeting the interests of both parties and proposing the most appropriate decision. To be effective, the process of mediating family conflicts as a kind of intervention in a dispute should depend on such principles as the voluntary nature of the parties’ cooperation with mediators and the readiness of the parties to solve the problem successfully.

Mediation is a type of the outside help to resolve the conflict when it is necessary to present the independent point of view on the issue and regulate the decision-making process because of the parties’ inability to control the situation and make reasonable decisions. Family-related conflicts have definite characteristics which help to distinguish them among the other types of conflicts.

Family conflicts are based on such notions as intimacy, compulsion, and smallness (Folberg, Milne, & Salem, 2004). The problems in relations, financial issues, problems in understanding, and issues of children care can provoke the development of different family-related conflicts which main characteristics are the dependence on strong emotions and lack of effective communication.

To respond to family conflicts, mediators should overcome the parties’ strong emotions, providing the necessary emotional preparing for negotiations, resolve perceptual problems in order to form the independent vision of a question, to give the opportunity for parties to listen to each other in order to avoid the communication difficulties (Moore, 2003).

In spite of the fact mediators often do not have legal powers, they can help parties to take over the conflict in cooperation with lawyers in order to resolve all the emotional issues and provide them the opportunity to work only with legal aspects of the question. Thus, mediators are used to take over the process of resolving emotional tensions and misconceptions when the parties are involved in divorce negotiations (Coulson, 1996).

Many people who have to use the help of mediators to resolve their family-related conflicts are involved in the divorce process. Ann and Richard have been married for 9 years. Their child’s name was Tom, and the boy was 8 years old when his parents decided to divorce. The cause for divorce was not stated clearly because Ann and Richard could not overcome their emotions and provide reasonable decisions.

The spouses insisted to be divorced because of the emotional discrepancy and difficulties in communication. However, the main problem was in the fact that the parents could not resolve the issue of the child custody and residential questions.

Ann wanted Tom to live in her house when Richard also was ready to provide all the necessary conditions for Tom’s living in his apartment. Ann and Richard decided to use the help of mediators because they could not observe the problem impartially, and it was necessary to plan the work with lawyers without references to emotional issues.

Mediators can use general and contingent tactics, depending on the particular features of the conflict (Moore, 2003). In this case, the help of a mediator was necessary to overcome the emotional tension which prevented the parents from making reasonable decisions.

Having overcome the communication difficulties with reducing the tension and proposing Ann and Richard to participate in the open dialogue, the mediator helped the parents to agree to have the joint guardianship because of the necessity to provide the opportunities for Tom to communicate with both parents.

The demand for joint guardianship was the first point to discuss with lawyers. Nevertheless, the residential issue became controversial. The mediator proposed to choose the place for living according to Tom’s needs, paying attention to such aspects as life conditions, surroundings, location, and distance from school and develop the specific schedule of parent-child communication.

Divorces are usually based on many preceding conflicts, and the task of mediators is to regulate the consequences of these conflicts in order to meet the interests of both parties and children. Theory of mediating family conflicts can be successfully used to overcome controversial aspects of the problem when mediators choose the most effective practice with references to the specific features of the conflict.

Thus, in this case, the mediator reduced the emotional tension between the parents, made the accents on cooperation to meet the child’s needs, presented the advantages of joint guardianship as the form of child custody, and proposed the variants to solve the residential problem with reference to planning the effective schedule.

However, in spite of the fact theory of mediation and the practical methods can be successfully used to overcome a conflict, it is difficult to predict it with the help of these methods because they are developed to work with a conflict as a process and to take over its consequences.

Coulson, R. (1996). Family mediation: Managing conflict, resolving disputes . San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.

Folberg, J., Milne, A. L., & Salem, P. (2004). Divorce and family mediation: Models, techniques, and applications. USA: Guilford Press.

Moore, C. W. (2003). The mediation process: Practical strategies for resolving conflict. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.

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IvyPanda . (2018) 'Mediation of Family Conflicts'. 20 June.

IvyPanda . 2018. "Mediation of Family Conflicts." June 20, 2018. https://ivypanda.com/essays/mediation-of-family-conflicts/.

1. IvyPanda . "Mediation of Family Conflicts." June 20, 2018. https://ivypanda.com/essays/mediation-of-family-conflicts/.

Bibliography

IvyPanda . "Mediation of Family Conflicts." June 20, 2018. https://ivypanda.com/essays/mediation-of-family-conflicts/.

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